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Critic Reviews

The horror flick, at its height, was a lyrical caressing of our fears; by the end of this nonsense, you fear for the well-being of the genre. 'It's dead!'

-Anthony Lane

It's empty calories: There isn't a single nourishing, non-synthetic sequence in the entire movie. Not a scene. Not a line. Not a look.

-David EdelsteinFull Review

This moronic abomination is not a movie. It's just a noisy, nasty and repulsive video game-slash- theme-park haunted-house ride designed to appeal to the offspring of warlocks and trolls.

-Rex ReedFull Review

This is one of the dopiest movies of the year.

-Richard RoeperFull Review

The orgy of morphing, shrieking, lightning-cracking, and habitual rope-swinging quickly turns oppressive.

-Ed ParkFull Review

A special-effects extravaganza that uses the barest of excuses to bring these characters together.

-Desson Thomson

There's never a dull moment, but there's also never a moment. It never stops. It's a perpetual-motion machine.

-Stephen Hunter

A junk-food feast for the eyes and utterly thought-cleansing fast for the intellect.

-Geoff PevereFull Review

This movie is just too silly for words.

-Moira MacDonaldFull Review

A big, loud, boring wreck.

-Mick LaSalleFull Review

This is what happens when you spend pots of money on special effects but don't give a fig about storytelling.

-Stephanie ZacharekFull Review

Feels more like a glorified trailer -- all rampaging high points edited into a frenzy -- than like an actual movie.

-Joe BaltakeFull Review

A turbo-charged retelling of the Dracula, Frankenstein and Wolf Man sagas, this extravagant creature-feature crams everything in but Abbott and Costello.

-Jay BoyarFull Review

The experience of watching the film is best described as deadening.

-Lisa RoseFull Review

Van Helsing is more amusing and exciting than frightening.

-Lou Lumenick

Old monster movies were thrilling in a way that mingled terror, sexuality and a real preference for the monsters over their tormentors. Van Helsing is a kiddie adventure on an endless, meaningless loop.

-Jami BernardFull Review

The rare kind of movie where the badness just adds to the fun.

-Rene RodriguezFull Review

We've seen worse movies -- I'm sure of it -- but this opening salvo of the summer season is so extravagantly, off-the-wall bad it pushes the others from memory.

-Eric HarrisonFull Review

The idea is every bit as dumb as the execution.

-Rick GroenFull Review

No one's going to argue that Van Helsing is a great movie, but it's just the sort of loud, splashy, silly, summer fun flick we've come to expect.

-Tom Long

Loud, clunky attempt at updating the classic Universal Pictures baddies of the '30s and '40s.

-John MonaghanFull Review

A vampire movie that's dressed to kill, but unable to draw blood.

-Robert Denerstein

Enjoying the overblown but well-intentioned Van Helsing requires the campy mind-set of that TV show, not the spooky gravity of classic monster flicks.

-Michael BoothFull Review

Silly and spectacular, and fun.

-Roger EbertFull Review

Van Helsing is one excruciatingly loud set piece of CGI hooey after another, and when a character or a plot twist does manage to make you laugh, you're not sure whether it's camp or ineptitude.

-Ty BurrFull Review

Looks like a movie assembled by a room full of computer geeks munching Doritos and playing Wolfenstein in between stints of designing Dracula's fangs.

-Bill MullerFull Review

The dashing Jackman plays his part well enough, but the script doesn't provide sufficient Indiana Jones-style bons mots to win us over.

-Claudia PuigFull Review

A shrieking bore.

-Peter Travers

A noisy, 19th-century fantasy adventure that goes nowhere.

-Steven Rea

Despite the rococo obsessiveness of its special effects and its voracious sampling of past horror movies, Van Helsing is mostly content to offer warmed-over allusions and secondhand thrills.

-A.O. ScottFull Review


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